Monday, August 21, 2006

its a blinder - well kinda - ok its not

A newly married couple arrive back at their bridal suite after their wedding celebrations. They begin to get intimate with each other until the bride pulled away slightly.

“I have a secret, which I must tell you before we go any further. I am not a virgin. I once had a brief fling with Tiger Woods”

The guy raises his eyebrows, but allays his new bride’s fears by saying, “That’s ok darling, we all have a past. It’s our future that is more important.” With this the couple embrace and make passionate love all over the bridal suite, screaming the place down as they reach their peak. Exhausted, but very pleased with his performance, the groom gets up and pads over to the telephone and picks it up.

“What are you doing?” she asks.

“Calling room service, I’m a bit peckish now.”

“Tiger didn’t do that.”

“Oh? What did Tiger do?”

“He came back to bed and made love to me a second time.”

With that, the groom put down the phone and joined his wife back in the bed and put in another sterling performance. A little while afterwards, he got up and walked over to the phone and picked it up.

“What are you doing?” she asked.

“Well, I’m still peckish, so I was going to call Room Service.”

“Tiger didn’t do that.”

“Really? What did Tiger do?”

“He came back to bed and made love to me for a third time.”

So the groom replaced the handset and rejoined his new wife in the bed and put in another excellent shift. A little while afterwards, he again went to the phone and picked it up.

“What are you doing?”

“I’m starving now love, I was going to call room service for a bit of nosh.”

“Tiger didn’t do that”

“No? What did Tiger do?”

“He came back to bed and made love to me for a fourth time.”

A bit weary now, the groom put down the phone. He was so eager to please his new wife that he rejoined her in bed and put in a bit of quality overtime. A short time afterwards, the groom got out of bed, walked over to the phone and picked it up.

“What are you doing?”

“I’m calling Tiger Woods to find out what the bloody par is on this hole!”

2 comments:

TOSH said...

thought you would :D

TOSH said...

thought you would :D